Money

Living On One Income As A Stay At Home Mom

For those of you who are new here, I’m a mom of 3 under 5 and my husband is a resident doctor.   We’ve been living on one income even before kids. Anything extra that I made part time went into savings. However I embraced the stay at home “wife” status even before kids and don’t regret a minute of it! People asked “what do you do all day?” a LOT!  But it made having a baby less financially shocking since I didn’t have to leave a $50K/year job.

How much money is in our monthly budget

For clarity, the 3,000 we budget is what gets dropped into our account after money for taxes is withheld and a small portion saved for retirement. It is also after his work auto deducts our health and dental insurance costs. So those things are not found in our budget because they come out of his paycheck first.

Also, we are not receiving public assistance such as WIC.

Now before you go on thinking “O the glamorous life of a doctor’s wife,”  I’ll let you in on a little secret. Doctors don’t get a big paycheck till like 15 years after high school. Not to mention if they have kids and a stay at home wife to provide for. 4 years of college, 4 years of med school, and 3-7 years of residency making less than a 1st-year nurse.

And then, time to pay off all those med school loans (average is around $200,000 before interest, which often brings it up to $300,000 or more). Basically it makes it so you CAN’T leave medicine.

coins stacked up with plants sprouting out of them with a jar of coins at the end of the row of coins

This post contains affiliate links. We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.

Living on one income with 5 people: How we live on $3,000 a month

I know we sacrifice luxuries without a second income, but it’s worth it to me. If you are trying to figure out how to live on one income, I think you can! You will need to:

  • Make a list of all your bills
  • Cut out a lot of optional bills
  • Start an emergency fund for the unexpected
  • Stop shopping like you do now
  • Possibly downsize your home (hopefully not)
  • Maybe even make some side money from home

1. Learn to be content with what you have

This is at the top for a reason.  Peter and I want to live a life where we are content with what we have (at any income) and thankful for it.  The quickest way to be discontent for me is to wish I could have things other people have that I can’t afford.  It’s called coveting and I’m guilty of it.

It’s so easy for me to think “Well if I had more money, I’d feel cute in new clothes too.” Or “If we could rent a house with a yard instead of an apartment my life could be so much better.” We have so much material blessing and food to eat and our kids are happy!

When I start to wish I could spend more money or buy all this stuff I have to really first examine my heart and the culture I’m buying into.

2. Track your income and expenses

You will hear this from any person who is smart with their money.  They know where it goes.

This has honestly been the hardest for us and the main reason for going over has been poor tracking. The Mint app just wasn’t my favorite to work with and I wanted something super basic.  We finally just started an excel spreadsheet and it’s helpful and honest!

  • First column A is for EVERY expense.
  • Then column B is where I note what the expense was for.
  • Column C I put the amount that gets dropped into our account once a month from Peter’s paycheck.
  • I learned how to format the cells to add up our expenses in Column A and to subtract it from his paycheck in column C. This reveals how much under or over budget we are.  Good ol’ fashioned “balancing the checkbook” except digital version.

Every so often (about once a week), I log onto our credit card account and add all the new transactions to my spreadsheet.  Then I go to our bank login and do the same since some of our bills like rent and water and power come out of there.

One family one income with 5 people
Creating a budget and knowing how much you can spend after bills is critical for a stay at home mom living paycheck to paycheck.

3. Choose housing you can afford

It would be hard for us to live in certain places on $3,000 a month without going down to a studio apartment for all 5 of us or moving into a less than desirable neighborhood.  We did not apply for residencies in cities like New York City or San Fransisco. With $3,000 a month to budget for bills, we would have to downgrade a lot to afford to live. We were told many residents with families shared houses in the Silicone Valley just to make rent. Not. My. Style.

Knowing our budget means sacrificing space or being willing to find housing in a place we can afford. It means making sure one paycheck can cover rent or a mortgage, not two.

I know many suggest buying over renting because the monthly mortgage payment is lower than rent and it is going towards owning something.  However, we have chosen to rent a house at this time.

Here’s a great article from The White Coat Investor on why he recommends renting during residency.

4. Save money by staying home a lot

Thankfully we like to be home and find it relaxing! But it really saves money. On the weekends we do free stuff like hanging out with friends or go to the zoo, which is not a monthly expense since we bought a yearly pass.

We don’t do many weekend trips either as it’s spending money we don’t have in our budget, and that is stressful. Gas alone can add up to an extra $$50-$100 for a trip plus food, so it definitely saves money to stay local. I’m hoping to add more outdoor activities that are free like hiking as well. But ya know…3 kids and sometimes I just get lazy.

5. We don’t do big dates & gifts

a couple holding hands as they hold coffee mugs at a restaurant
I really do miss going out to coffee alone with my husband, or going out for dates regularly. However, a babysitter alone costs $50 for 3 kids plus dinner, so we are learning to enjoy each other at home after the kids are in bed. Often times that means putting away our phones.

Thankfully, Peter knows I love him in smaller ways.

It’s our goal to go on a date once a month with no kids, but honestly, it’s WAY less than that. More like, whenever my parents fly to see us, haha. Instead, he’ll pick up some ice cream and we will watch a favorite show on Netflix ($10/month) or Amazon Prime which is free to anyone who is a Prime member ($120/year).  Get a 30 day free trial for Amazon Prime here.

It’s also a treat to just sit down and play cribbage or cards and have some tea, uninterrupted by kids at night!

We understand it’s less stressful to overspend on a big gift for special occasions like Christmas, birthdays, Valentines Day, Anniversary.  Things like notes, a box of our favorite candy, one rose instead of a dozen, and ordering pizza are enough to make it special. That saves hundreds to be honest!

6. Save money by not eating out

Duh. The easiest way to save money, especially with kids.  We do still eat out a few times a month.  The big difference is we are not grabbing 2 Thai Food dishes for a total of $30-$40, we are grabbing a pizza for $10. I love having a break from cooking, so we do still get take out about 3-4 times a month.

When that doctor paycheck comes in someday, I’m looking forward to upgrading restaurants 😉 But for now, pizza is a great budget treat and allows us to go a few times per month instead of just one.

Update November 2018: We found ourselves overspending month after month, and eating out was the first thing that had to go. Check out how we did a very successful no spend month (just buying gas, groceries, and bills) and ended up with about $300 extra to save!

7. Grocery shop once a week and no more

a close up of the banana isle at the store full of yellow bananas

I would say our grocery bill for 2 adults and 3 small kids is around $500-$600.  That also includes things like toilet paper. I don’t do meal planning like I should but I’m sure that would save me money.  We really like hosting dinners about once a month with friends, which increases the cost of food by $20-$50/month.

But the thing that really helps us stay in budget is doing one grocery trip per week.  One week of each month we do a big Costco trip where we buy most of what we use for the month, usually around $200 worth.  Then each week after we go for milk, cream, fruits, and veggies.

We also shop at the absolute cheapest store I’ve ever seen, called Aldis.  And an Asian Food market. If we bought the same amount of groceries from a mainstream store like Safeway, our grocery bill would for sure be at least $100-$200 higher a month.

And, we use a grocery receipt app called Ibotta that gives us cash for things we are already buying. I just scan my receipts.  Get $10 just for signing up!

Typical food we buy for a family of 5

Fresh fruits and veggies: $30-$50/week.

Dairy: $30/week (milk, cream, eggs, cheese, cottage cheese)

Dry oats, cereal and milk, or eggs (daily breakfast). Eggs (2 dozen/week).

Peter’s lunch for work: He gets a salad and chicken breast almost every day.  His request! I literally put a frozen chicken breast in our Instant Pot pressure cooker with some seasonings and press the poultry button…and it’s done in 15 minutes!

Snacks for kids: fruits and veggies, cottage cheese, crackers, rice reheated from dinner, smoothies, cereal, peanut butter on anything, cookies we make, and hard-boiled eggs.

Related Post: Check out 10 healthy snack foods for kids here.

Dinners: A lot of chicken with vegetables made tons of different ways. Soups, Asian food with rice (check out my easy Thai Curry recipe), chicken rice and beans, ok, we do chicken rice and beans in a lot of ways a lot of times per week, haha. Just realized that while writing!

Groceries I try not to buy to save money:

  • Pre-made food.  This is hard because I LOVE eating it and it’s easy.  Give me all the things in those Costco freezers lol!  When our budget increases our food budget will be the first thing to go up for me haha.
  • Fish and shrimp.  Ok, this is hard for me.  I grew up eating fresh fish and shellfish! But it’s the quickest way to spend triple what I normally would for dinner. There are so many health benefits to eating fish though that we are going to try incorporating this into our diet more. Update November 2018: We now eat wild salmon once a week. It’s so healthy, brings our stomachs so much joy, and I justified it since we decided to completely cut out our eating out budget.
  • Expensive cheeses and meats.
  • Alcohol.
  • Drinks.

Milk is our only beverage. In the summer we buy Crystal Light lemonade to add to water.

8. We use credit card rewards to get $500+ back/year

In an effort to build credit and also score on bonuses, we use a credit card for anything that we can that we would normally be buying.  I know a cash-only budget would save us more money, but I just love the convenience and perks of a credit card.  We don’t buy anything we don’t already have the money for, and we have never paid a cent in credit card interest because we pay it off on auto-pay each month.

I love our Chase Saphire Preferred Card.  It has an amazing bonus of 50,000 points when you spend 4,000 in the first 3 months.  We got it when we knew we were going to for sure spend that much due to moving across the country, and scored the $500 reward bonus to use however we want.

Since the first year’s annual fee is waived, we get the bonus and cancel the card to avoid an annual fee. I learned much of how to get card bonuses without decreasing your credit score from travelmiles101.com.

Purchases that go on the credit card

  • Groceries
  • Gas
  • Plane tickets
  • Some bills
  • Amazon Prime
  • All other online purchases.

We get a small bonus back at the end of the year (usually 1-2%), as well as a sign-up bonus like cash, free hotel stays, or a free ticket home each year to visit family. If a credit card has no annual fee we keep it. Otherwise, we close cards with yearly fees after we receive the bonus. Generally, you can reapply for the same card +bonus every two years after closing the card.

9. Skip the warranties

I figure if we skip the warranties on all things then if and when that one thing breaks we have the money in our account from all those warranties we didn’t buy over the years 🙂 Also, check your credit cards because a lot of them have a one-year purchase protection if the product breaks (if bought with the card).

10. We drive one car (and it’s older)

Now, this is pushing crazy with three kids, but it saves a ton of money. Our 1998 car is paid off and fits us all (barely). As much as I really do want another car,  having just one car saves us insurance, gas, tabs, and upkeep.

We will be adding a family van(used) this year from our savings so that we can purchase it in cash.  This is why putting a little away each month when possible is SO good!  Because when it comes time to buy the car we will not have to add a monthly payment for the car itself or go into debt.  That is a huge relief when living on a small income.

However other costs will go up for two cars like insurance, maintenance, and gas so we will need to decrease our budget somewhere else.

Update November 2018: We purchased a minivan in cash 6 months ago and it has been life giving to me as a stay at home mom. I now have a social life, take the kids to the library, can drive to bible study, spend time with my hubby on the weekends instead of grocery shopping…but…insurance and gas went WAY up, which means our eating out and random spending has gone WAY down, haha.

11. We YouTube car maintenance when needed

This is 100% my awesome husband.  He keeps the oil and fluids going and tires rotated when needed.  He goes to YouTube when things stop working and fixes them for the price of parts.  I am clueless with cars and I know that the reason our car hasn’t already died is that he has kept it as tuned up as possible.

If you can learn how to fix a car issue, or just have a car with no issues lol, it will save you thousands of dollars! We were literally headed out of our driveway to a family reunion with the kids a couple years back when our car started smoking.  It was a $400 fix to take it in, but he bought the part for $50 and we were off 3 hours later.  Thank you, YouTube!

12. Learn basic plumbing skills

If I could tell you how much money we have saved by not calling the plumber…it’s hundreds! Between losing tons of hair down the drain after each baby has been born (ya that actually happens if you didn’t know!) to kids dropping things down the sink and toilet for fun…ug.

Gross but someone’s gotta do it. I highly recommend you get a snake for unclogging drains and YouTube how to use it.

13. We use older cell phones

We have older iPhones, usually 2-3 versions behind the newest.  These are easy to find on Craigslist or buy from friends and family.  While it does take cash upfront, it’s usually half the total amount of a new phone. We have also accepted free phones that have defects or are just old…because it still calls and texts, which is baseline what we need them for.

Update: I did just buy a new iPhone (not the newest model) which was kind of like a sock in the face to our goal of spending less.  However, we decided I could use some of the money I’ve earned from blogging as a down payment which decreased the monthly payment a lot.

Considering this is the one tool that I use to take and edit all the photos for my blog and business so I justified it a bit…we all do that with something right?! My poor iPhone 5 had been dropped in the toilet twice, submerged in a can of paint once, and had a completely shattered screen for the past 6 months… how it was still working I do not know!

14. We do preschool at home

As much as I’d love a little break, sending two kids to preschool two mornings a week is around $400/month.  Just not a possibility on a small budget.  Instead, I’ve started a super easy preschool routine at home.  Mostly for my 4-year-old and a tad for my 2-year-old.

15. We buy clothes used or new on a super sale

I get our kid’s clothes mostly used from Ebay, ThredUP, thrift stores, and sometimes new.  We find really great steals when we shop Holiday sales.  For Peter,  JCPennys has one of the best big and tall sections so we get super steals for Peter’s work clothes.

We often will use a $10 off $10 or more coupon, combined with a 15% cashback through Ebates. One year I bought Peter 10 new sweaters from JCPennys for $75 using the clearance sale, an online coupon, and Ebates!

I almost never buy clothes and my husband has literally asked me to go get some nicer things, haha.  The reason why I like ThredUP (for myself, but also for kids) is that it’s like shopping at an online thrift store but I can search sizes and brands that I know fit.  Plus I like knowing my money is going to an ordinary person like you and me. Sign up to get $10 after you place your first order.

16. We use money saving sites

Groupon

This really helps with things we already want to buy, especially local!  One thing I knew would be 100% worth the money was a zoo pass since we live 10 minutes away.  Before buying, we just googled it and found that Groupon had a 50% off offer, saving us $150! It’s also perfect for date night because we can count on getting our food for half price if it’s on Groupon. If you don’t have an account yet sign up here.

Ebates cashback

A little gem that’s gotten popular with online shoppers is the cashback site Ebates. You can see details of how it works in my saving with Ebates post. Whenever I’m shopping online, I get a percent cash back, anywhere from 1-15% at over 2,000 shops online.

Ebates sends me a payment via PayPal quarterly, so it’s just a perk on top of what I’m already buying.  I get cash back on diapers, clothes, gifts, photo prints. So far I’ve earned almost $400 over the last few years on things I was already purchasing. Sign up for Ebates with that little green button below to start saving.

Ebates Coupons and Cash Back

Snagshout & Vipon secret

This saves us hundreds of dollars each year.  Snagshout and Vipon is a must! These are two sites where everything is 50% off or better.  We find so much stuff for our household on there from lightbulbs to bed sheets to winter gloves!  Everything is like 50-70% off.

Basically, these sites started out giving discounted items in exchange for reviews on Amazon or a social media shout out… but since Amazon doesn’t allow that as of last year reviews are 100% optional now.  Check out my post on how Snagshout works here.

Amazon Prime

I know this isn’t a “money saving site” but since we have been Prime members for about 8 years now we have saved tons of money on the free two day shipping (which pairs perfectly with Snagshout’s discounted products).

We also get Free Prime video that I use to watch kid shows like Mr. Rodgers, Tumble Leaf, and Zaboomafoo! So we rarely pay for Netflix and never ever cable. Try Prime free for 30 days here!

Ibotta

This app is AWESOME! I’m sure you have heard of it.  I scan grocery receipts of stores they support (most major grocery stores) and get money back for items I’m already buying.  I was so excited to get my first $20 back via PayPal!  Get $10 by signing up and scanning your first receipt.

Decide it’s ok to give smaller gifts

For years Christmas time has really stressed me out because of how expensive gifts are when we are buying for so many people.  And more so, because I hadn’t saved money just for that. When people would give us a $50 gift or $100 gift in my family I would feel so bad that I couldn’t reciprocate.  Here is how we have managed to do Christmas on a budget and enjoy it more by spending less.

Why you need to start a side hustle when you live on one income

Side hustles give you the cushion you want to treat yourself now and then, or buy a few things for the kids. My side hustles are:

  1. I have a small Mary Kay business that provides a little extra spending money.  Plus it pays for all of my skin care and makeup.  Not having to buy those things from our budget saves hundreds a year!
  2. Website usability testing for companies like Target, Nordstrom, AT&T.  Basically, companies pay to complete a task on their site and tell them how they could improve the user experience! This takes about 15 minutes and pays $10 via PayPal exactly 7 days after I complete a “job”.  See my full post on how easy website usability testing is here.
  3. I’ve sold a ton on Craigslist. Attempting to get rid of clutter, inspired by Marie Kondo’s book, I wanted to sell a lot of what we had.  At one point I was making an extra $100 a month minimum by getting rid of things! See how I sold a ton on Craiglist in this post.
  4. Blogging. In my first year blogging I have learned how to work with brands for free product and paid posts. This has saved us so much money! Especially on things we were already going to purchase.

Living  on one income is possible!

If you made it this far you deserve some ice cream or something! If you really desire to live on one income or are forced to you can!  There are always places you can cut your budget or lifestyle changes to make. It’s just some are more painful to change like where you live or the size of your home. What are some ways you save money? Leave me a comment and I’d love to hear more!

Follow Blue and Hazel on Instagram!

SaveSaveSaveSave

SaveSaveSaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSaveSaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

24 thoughts on “Living On One Income As A Stay At Home Mom

    1. Hey Maddie! I’m so glad you read this and I want to check that software out. Is it free? Thanks for the tip I’ve never heard of it. Hope you guys are doing well and that the transition is going ok! Miss you!

    1. I’m so glad you read it and yes you are right, it’s important how we think about what we have and what we need. Thanks for letting me know you liked the post!

    1. Hey Valerie! That would be so awesome! I wish you the best as you get to that place. I’ve heard great things from people who have tried living on one income for a few months just to try it out, even before leaving their job. Good luck!

  1. Great post! My husband and I have always lived on one income (saving the second), so when I left my job a year ago to stay home with our kids it made the transition so much easier. My parents instilled the concept of “live beneath your means” while I was growing. It looks as if you have mastered this principle. Bravo!

    1. Wow that’s so smart of you guys to save one income even when you were working! I bet that’s really paid off. What a cool gift your parents gave you too just by setting that example!

  2. Those are amazing tips for everyone in a tight budget! I love it, i’m going through a phase right now where I really need to cut back on my expenses and track things down a bit better, so this was really helpful!

    1. I’m glad you found it helpful! I think everyone goes through times where saving is necessary and yes, track it all because it’s the best place to start!

  3. Awesome article! I agree with minimalism part…we want so many things we really don’t need! Thank you this article has given me a bit more on what I can do more to budget on one income as well.

    1. Yes! Minimalism is awesome and hard for some reason! I realize I’ll be organizing the same stuff over and over again when really I just need to get rid of more so there is less to organize.

  4. Great post, my husband and I live outside of Seattle and I don’t think we’d be able to live on one income at the moment but that would be the dream. We’d have a few financial goals to reach before it was possible.

    Meal planning totally helps me with our grocery budget, and I just tried ordering grocery delivery for the first time and being able to shop online helps me stick to my list and not impulse by. I was amazed my bill was almost $40 cheaper than if I had gone into the store!

    1. I have yet to try grocery delivery but I really want to! Or even grocery pick up, which would also help stop impulse buys while saving time. And it would be SO hard around the Seattle area, prices of rent alone are outrageous. I hope you get where you want to be. And by the way, your website is stunning!

  5. Thank you for the tips. We recently started living on one income because sending two year old twins and an 8 month old to child care was too expensive. It’s been hard but we have been making it work.

    1. Hi Andrea,
      You sound so busy and congratulations on twins and an 8 month old! I hope that you are able to transition well to one income, and I’d love to know what types of things you have cut out that make it possible! I think one of the hardest parts of living on one small income is not being able to pay for some of the conveniences that would be nice, like eating out, frequent babysitters, or house cleaning. But the payoff is huge. You got this!

  6. Also a fellow residents wife here! Expecting our first baby at the end of the year, and since we just moved cross country and I’m not working, I’ve also taken up blogging (you have some of the most helpful tips, for real!) and all of these suggestions are fantastic!

    1. Lauren, how cool your husband is in residency too and you have a baby on the way! Since a resident salary (with a stay at home wife and baby) is not that much, blogging will be a fantastic way to help out with finances. I hope you will find the financial payoff of all your hard work with blogging, just don’t give up! We live on just my husband’s salary with 3 kids, and this year since my blogging income has increased we put that into savings/emergency fund.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *